Embrace Real Love

Discover the difference between love that drains you and love that sustains you — including the love you give yourself.

You know this pattern …

You’re the one everyone turns to. The reliable one. The one who holds it all together, remembers the birthdays, checks in on people, says yes when you’re already exhausted.

And somewhere along the way, you stopped noticing that the giving only flows in one direction. You tell yourself this is what love looks like. That good people put others first. That needing something for yourself is selfish. So you keep going — until you’re running on empty, wondering why you feel so alone in rooms full of people who supposedly love you.

Maybe you’ve noticed other patterns too. The way you measure your worth is by how much you’re needed. The anxiety that creeps in when someone pulls away. The relationships that feel more like work than rest. The nagging question you try not to ask: Am I actually loved — or just useful?

Here’s the truth nobody taught you – what you learned about love is probably backwards.

Where this came from

Most of us learned about love from people who didn’t know how to love themselves. We learned to earn affection through achievement. To measure our worth by approval. To confuse intensity with intimacy, and sacrifice with love.

These patterns show up everywhere:

• Saying yes when you mean no
• Feeling guilty when you rest
• Keeping score without realising it
• Mistaking anxiety for caring
• Putting everyone else first while running on empty
• Wondering if you’re truly loved — or just convenient

This isn’t a character flaw. It’s conditioning. And it can be unlearned.

The blocks this workshop addresses

• Misunderstanding love — chasing connection based on fear rather than wholeness
• Neglecting self-care — running on empty across body, mind and spirit

These two are deeply connected. When you don’t know what real love looks like, you can’t give it to yourself. And when you’re depleted, you have nothing genuine to offer anyone else — just performance, obligation, and eventual resentment.

What real love actually looks like

Real love — the kind that sustains rather than drains — works completely differently from what most of us were taught.

It doesn’t keep score. It doesn’t need to be earned. It feels spacious and safe, not intense and uncertain. It includes you, not just everyone else.

In this workshop, you’ll learn the difference between mind-based love (conditional, calculated, exhausting) and heart-based love (unconditional, flowing, energising). You’ll discover why attachment feels like love but creates anxiety instead of peace. And you’ll understand — perhaps for the first time — what it actually means to love yourself without it being selfish.

Because here’s what changes everything: when you extend real love to yourself first, everyone around you benefits from the overflow. You stop giving from emptiness. You start giving from fullness.

Your day with us

We’ll spend the day together at Clayton Hotel Chiswick — a small group, guided by Steve and Cilla, exploring what love really is and how it actually works.

• Unlearning What You Were Taught. Discover why everything you learned about love might be backwards. We’ll explore how childhood shaped your love patterns — and why those patterns keep repeating.
• Love vs Attachment. Learn the crucial difference between mind-based love and heart-based love. Understand why some relationships energise you while others exhaust you — and what creates the difference.
• The Five Dimensions of Self-Care. Go beyond surface-level self-care to address what you actually need: physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually and relationally. Create a personal plan that’s realistic and sustainable.
• Boundaries Without Walls. Learn how to protect your energy without shutting people out. Discover that healthy boundaries improve relationships — they don’t end them.

Throughout the day, you control what you share. Many people gain profound insights just from listening and doing the individual exercises.

What you’ll leave with

• Clear understanding of what healthy love actually looks like — and feels like
• The ability to distinguish love from attachment in your relationships
• Freedom from constantly measuring or proving your worth
• A personal self-care plan that addresses all five dimensions of well-being
• Practical tools for setting boundaries without guilt
• The ability to love others without losing yourself

This workshop is for you if…

• You give and give but feel empty
• You say yes when you mean no
• You feel guilty when you prioritise yourself
• You wonder if you’re loved or just useful
• You confuse intensity with intimacy
• You’re exhausted from performing love instead of experiencing it

Facilitators:

• Steve Roche & Cilla Hall (Authors of Rebecoming)
• Steve and Cilla don’t teach this work from textbooks — they teach it because they’ve lived it. Both have walked this path themselves: through the patterns of over-giving, through learning what real love actually requires, and through to relationships that sustain rather than drain.

Venue:

Clayton Hotel Chiswick

Workshop Details

The Truth About Love runs twice yearly in London.

• Dates: Saturday 14 February 2026
• Location: Clayton Hotel Chiswick. 626 Chiswick High Road, London W4 5RY. (5-minute walk from Gunnersbury station)
• Time: 9:30am – 6;00pm (registration from 9:00am)
• Pricing: Early Bird – £145; Standard – £195

Buy Tickets

Your Day Includes:

• Full day workshop (8.5 hours)
• Lunch and refreshments
• FREE copy of the Rebecoming book
• Comprehensive workbook
• Practical tools to take home
• Small group size for personal attention

Questions?

Email us at info@headheartandsoul.co.uk